Someone asked me where I was "from" today. That lead to a discussion of where exactly you say you are from. If you have lived in multiple places as a child do you choose where you were born? Raised? Went to school? Started a life? What constitutes where someone is from?
I typically say the town in which I went to high school is where I am "from". Even though I technically lived in three other towns prior, I almost always say my high school town. I only lived there for five years. After I graduated, I moved on.
It got me to wondering why I chose that particular place to say I was "from". I came to the conclusion that "home" is where you are "from" and that "home" is the place with the warmest memories. Do not get me wrong, those high school years were a nightmare for me in many ways. And "home" certainly doesn't mean in my actual house. But that town had something to offer that I never found anywhere, which was comfort. I found comfort in a few select relationships that for the first time made me feel welcome for who I was.
The first house I lived in for just about a year. I obviously have no recollection of that. The second house I lived in until I was eight. That house was filled with childhood scars and I was fine leaving it. However I had a very close bond to my snow fort that year and do remember crying because I had to leave it in the front yard.
The next house I lived in held a lot of bad memories and surreal moments. Even Lifetime couldn't have made up the things that took place in my world then. I lived there until I was twelve when we moved into my father's childhood home. I have conveniently blocked out the entire moving process as well as a lot of life in general back then.
I was not really fond of my high school town. My family did not meet the economic standards for living there which posed a lot of issues. Our family was "grandfathered" in (family had lived in the same small run down house since the early 1900's). The town itself was like living in a bubble. The people were ruthless and judgmental. However, through it all I found pieces of myself and connected to others. I found families of friends that were the family I never had. I found partners, love interests and people that genuinely wanted to be in my space, not felt obligated to.
When I say I am from that town it is because the most tender memories of my young life reside there. It is because the tragic memories of my past did not follow me. It is because in some people I had found "home".
I typically say the town in which I went to high school is where I am "from". Even though I technically lived in three other towns prior, I almost always say my high school town. I only lived there for five years. After I graduated, I moved on.
It got me to wondering why I chose that particular place to say I was "from". I came to the conclusion that "home" is where you are "from" and that "home" is the place with the warmest memories. Do not get me wrong, those high school years were a nightmare for me in many ways. And "home" certainly doesn't mean in my actual house. But that town had something to offer that I never found anywhere, which was comfort. I found comfort in a few select relationships that for the first time made me feel welcome for who I was.
The first house I lived in for just about a year. I obviously have no recollection of that. The second house I lived in until I was eight. That house was filled with childhood scars and I was fine leaving it. However I had a very close bond to my snow fort that year and do remember crying because I had to leave it in the front yard.
The next house I lived in held a lot of bad memories and surreal moments. Even Lifetime couldn't have made up the things that took place in my world then. I lived there until I was twelve when we moved into my father's childhood home. I have conveniently blocked out the entire moving process as well as a lot of life in general back then.
I was not really fond of my high school town. My family did not meet the economic standards for living there which posed a lot of issues. Our family was "grandfathered" in (family had lived in the same small run down house since the early 1900's). The town itself was like living in a bubble. The people were ruthless and judgmental. However, through it all I found pieces of myself and connected to others. I found families of friends that were the family I never had. I found partners, love interests and people that genuinely wanted to be in my space, not felt obligated to.
When I say I am from that town it is because the most tender memories of my young life reside there. It is because the tragic memories of my past did not follow me. It is because in some people I had found "home".
