Fetish Love - Wind Pants Style

In my never ending pursuit of human interest stories, poking around the recesses of the Internet, I came upon a gentleman with a great love for nylon wind pants; ADIDAS wind pants to be exact.  The bulge in the front of said pants made it quite obvious that his love was about far more than the fashion statement.

While I applauded his kink, and everyone's kinks for that matter, what I found the most endearing about this little kinkster, was his partner. His partner, happily adorned a pair of ADIDAS wind pants too. And while I am not 100% certain that they didn't meet up at a wind pants kink party, my gut says she does not necessarily share his fetish. That being said, and with her wind pants on, I COULD be 100% certain that her passion for his passion was genuine and beautiful.

As with all people stories I read, I find myself taking it in, forming opinions and trying to relate. In this case, I was admittedly envious of the wind pant couple.  I loved his zeal for the nylon and was amazed at her ability to go along for his ride. His ride made her ride.

His ride made her ride.  I love the picture that conjures up in my head. The dance I love and miss so much.  The finding of yourself by giving to someone else.  A concept a select few ever deeply find.  And my wind pant friends found it and seemed to have nurtured it into something mutually satisfying.

This just goes to show that you may not have the same interests, but you can, and should, encourage each others desires whenever possible. That nurturing the relationship is vital to survival and finding common ground. It's easy to get engrossed in your own things, especially when they differ from your partner's, but it's just as easy to find some common ground if you take more time and interest in what others are doing.

Unfortunately not all interests will end up in a sexually satisfying moment like my wind pant friends, but encouraging each other and taking a genuine interest in someone elses passions might just uncover a little spark you had long since thought you had lost.

Regrets

I am no expert. No really, I'm not. However, if you had ever had an actual conversation with me, you have probably experienced my unsolicited expertise in whatever topic we are discussing.  Likely it had little impact.  I know a little about a lot of things and a lot about very few.  I have tons of unusual life experiences to draw from, but in  no way does that make me an expert.  That being said, I have been thinking a lot about regrets and how to avoid as many as possible.  So I am offering, once again, my expert advice.

I have regrets.  I am sure most of us do. Typically, or for me anyway, they seem to come from situations that ultimately make us feel guilt or remorse. The tequila night that went bad, the time you made your grandmother cry, or when you left your baby at day care by accident. It happens.  When someone asks you "Do you have any regrets", one of those types of scenarios may come up. (And no, those are not my real life examples. Except for maybe the tequila one.)

We also have the "I didn't ever......." regrets.  I should have dated that 18 year old that said they liked cougars, I should have saved more money so my cats don't eat better than I do in retirement, and the ever popular, I should have traveled the world. These aren't really regrets, these or dreams or desires you held yourself back from. (Again, not mine. I have yet to be called a cougar.....dammit.)

So making my grandma cry, denying the 18 year old lover , and never leaving the country aren't regrettable? Well yes, we can regret the behavior, or lack there of. But the feelings that come from that regret are the shame, embarrassment, guilt etc.  Regret isn't a feeling. A feeling comes as a result of regretting something. And emotions are the reason we avoid doing things that we later end up regretting.

The vicious regret cycle.

Today I was thinking of so many things I want to do. Both bucket lists; the reality bucket and the fantasy bucket.  While my fantasy bucket overflows, I am truly not interested in pursuing most of its contents.  I have made the decision that not feelings, but potential bad consequences, land things in the fantasy bucket. I have way too many things to lose and little to gain by picking out of that hat.  The reality bucket list grows as I grow, not in age, but in self. And yet, I find myself visiting that bucket just as infrequently. For that I have regret, or most assuredly will someday.

I think I will head regret off at the pass, or meet it before it finds emotion.

I will stop thinking about what happens after I choose to fulfill a want or need and just fulfill it.

Sacrifice

It has been almost a year since I posted a blog.  In this blog's beginning, I was full of zest and zeal. I wrote daily. At some point it changed to weekly. Then monthly.  The sporadically.  Eventually something caused me to hit a brick wall and fall flat on my writer's ass.  Recently I realized, it was writing that caused me to stop writing.

When I began this blog, I threw my heart and soul to the wind and my readers. In return I found personal freedom, compassion, friends and connections.  I felt that my words made a difference to me and those that read them.  I opened the passion door and found amazing things behind it.  I loved the feelings so much that I reached out to more people and places to lay my words.  Apparently I reached too far.

Somewhere between then and now, writing became work.  I was so happy to contribute to all of the online papers and magazines. I was happily blogging my personal experiences and writing for myself and those that needed to relate. I took on project after project wanting to sink my teeth into everything.  And then, one day, I realized I was working.  No longer had my writing become a release.  I was losing the passion and drive.  I had to think about what I would write instead of hurrying to get to my computer and let out the words that were overflowing in my head. I had stretched my limits. I had sacrificed myself.

Sacrificing yourself.

I have spent a considerable amount of time thinking about that lately. So much time in fact, that it has gotten my writing juices flowing and encouraged me back to this blog.

In life, we are taught, learn, or decide that we must make sacrifices for the greater good, be it relationships, those less fortunate etc.  However somewhere I think many of us lose sight of what it means to sacrifice.  For me, sacrificing means giving up something or compromising to make whatever work. Certainly it should never be a negative thing, but rather something you WANT to do. It should be a conscious decision done in the best interest of whatever your particular interest is.  Sacrificing should be about giving OF yourself, not giving UP yourself.

Many times, for me anyway, the two get confused.  In the past I have found myself agreeing to be less than who I am to pacify a situation.  I have given up parts of me that, frankly, I liked. In an effort to keep moving forward, I didn't realize I lost some important things that didn't deserve to be left behind.

So today, on my first day back here, I will leave you all with the same thought I have been pondering lately:

Sacrifice for compromise should never mean losing yourself for change.